Welcome to those stopping in from Bonnie’s devotion at Proverbs 31 Ministries! You picked a great day to visit. Not only are we going to introduce you to one of the most gifted writers around today, but we’re also going to give you the chance to win some really cool prizes.
Today’s grand prize winner will receive a copy of Bonnie Grove’s debut novel, Talking to the Dead as well as an iPod Nano, pre-loaded with the songs Bonnie listened to while writing. Four additional winners will each receive a copy of her novel. All you have to do enter is leave a comment on this post or sign up for the She Reads monthly newsletter. Winners will be chosen on Wednesday, November 18th.
Bonnie Grove started writing when her parents bought a typewriter, and she hasn’t stopped since. Trained in Christian Counseling, theology and psychology, she developed and wrote strength-based social programs for families at risk while landing articles and stories in anthologies. She is the author of the non-fiction Your Best You: Discovering and Developing the Strengths God Gave You; and Talking to the Dead.
Bonnie’s ministry has spanned decades and includes such varied activities as leading street drama, door to door evangelism, Divorce Care, Alpha and other compassionate care ministries. She is a small group leader of a women’s ministry group. Bonnie speaks to women’s groups about how to discover and use their strengths. Her husband, Steve, is the Senior Pastor of Louise Street Community Church of the Nazarene in Saskatchewan, Canada. They have two children, Benjamin and Heather.
Talking to the Dead Summary:
Twenty-something Kate Davis can’t seem to get this grieving widow thing right. She’s supposed to put on a brave face and get on with her life, right? Instead she’s camped out on her living room floor, unwashed, unkempt, and unable to sleep-because her husband Kevin keeps talking to her. Is she losing her mind?
Kate’s attempts to find the source of the voice she hears are both humorous and humiliating, as she turns first to an “eclectically spiritual” counselor, then a shrink with a bad toupee, a mean-spirited exorcist, and finally group therapy. There she meets Jack, the warmhearted, unconventional pastor of a ramshackle church, and at last the voice subsides. But when she stumbles upon a secret Kevin was keeping, Kate’s fragile hold on the present threatens to implode under the weight of the past and Kevin begins to shout.
Will the voice ever stop? Kate must confront her grief to find the grace to go on, in this tender, quirky story about second chances.
You can read the first chapter of Talking to the Dead here.
Those who love books will find a kindred spirit in Bonnie. So we couldn’t help but pin her down and persuade her to fill us in on what it looks like to live and write in her world:
Tell us about yourself:
I’m a Canadian – my family and I make our home in Saskatchewan. My husband, Steve, is the senior pastor of a Nazarene church and we have two children, a boy age 8, and a girl age 6. Before I embarked on a writing career, I developed and wrote social programming for families at risk, focusing on issues of addiction. Now a days, I use my training in counseling, psychology, and theology in my writing. We have a busy, happy life that keeps us all hopping.
What made you start writing?
Simply not knowing I shouldn’t, I suppose. I love stories. Want my full attention? Tell me a story. I’ll sit there, wrapped up in the world you create until you tell me “The end.” I suppose it’s a natural progression from story lover to storyteller, to writer. By the time I was in high school I was writing what I thought of as “emotionally complex” stuff. Then my parents bought a typewriter and I wanted to try it. I wrote a very bad romance novel my mother loved, and I’ve been pounding out ever improving prose ever since.
Why do you write?
Like many people, I’m creative. I can’t play piano, and I’m the absolute worst scrapbooker you’ve ever seen (which is a total bummer!)My creativity flows with concepts and communication – words. Writing comes naturally for me and is simply an expression of who I am acted out in the world – just like all other forms of creativity we encounter every day.
Do you put yourself into your books/characters?
Am I a character in my books? Nah. But characters are a creation of the writer, so yes, I’m *in* there. Bits and pieces of me, and my take on people. When you write fiction you talk to people, research, and explore the ideas and concepts you want to talk about in the book. But, at the end of the day, you choose which angle you will come from, which side of the issue, which voice needs to speak, and ultimately, how the story will end. On that level it’s all me. But in time the characters move and breathe and make choices too, and that’s when I take my hand off and say, “go.”
How important is faith in your books?
I’m a Christian first in my life, before anything else. I live from a Christian worldview and I write from one. The way I approach faith in my writing is that I’m privileged to contribute to the ongoing discussion about what it means to be human. For me that means also discussing what it means for humanity to encounter God.
What themes do you like to write about?
Grace. I’m endlessly fascinated by God’s grace and what it looks like in the world. How it enfolds us, how it chases us down, how it strips us bare and shows us our need. Everything I’ve ever written is an exploration of some facet of God’s grace.
Within that over arching theme, I also like to explore the idea of “life as journey” or “process” as opposed to a rigid set of ideas about what life is and what we should be doing.
Lastly, I asked my husband what he saw as a theme in my writing. He said that all my work explores some kind of loss. After we talked about that for awhile, we decided that what I love to explore is the things we hold on to, and believe are “ours”, but they never were really ours – and that moment when God asks us to let go.
What’s your biggest challenge in balancing writing time with your other responsibilities?
Knowing when to stop. Everyone who works from home understands the challenge of how to keep work and home life separate. During the workday it’s so easy to just run downstairs and throw on a load of laundry. And on the weekend it is tempting to pull myself away from the fun in the backyard with the children and just jot down an idea or two. . . or three.
Perhaps it’s just a matter of learning to love the blurred lines between work and rest, but I’m hoping to find a greater balance. Novel writing takes up large chunks of my brain. When I’m not writing, I’m thinking about the book. If I’m not thinking about the book, I think I should be thinking about the book.
I’m working on balance. I talk to my husband about it, I plan my days so I take extended breaks when my children come home from school – things like that.
Ask me in five years how it’s working!
Who is your favorite author and why?
In January I began blogging with five other authors on a blog called Novel Matters. We all write fiction, and as part of the process of getting to know each other, we exchanged books. I’m blessed to have read the works of Patti Hill, Sharon K. Souza, Kathleen Popa, Debbie Fuller Thomas, and Latayne C. Scott. These are gifted writers who have taught me so much about writing. I highly recommend all of their books.
Other standout books have been Francine Rivers’ The Mark of the Lion Series (love, love LOVE her books), Susan Messiner’s The Shape of Mercy, Joy Jordon Lake’s Blue Hole Back Home.
I read a great deal of non-fiction as well and have fallen for writers like Brennan Manning, Francis Chan.
What has God been teaching you lately?
A deeper sense of how my identity is found in Him. This spring I was pushing myself hard to meet a deadline – really relying on my own ideas and talents to push out a book. I exhausted myself. I was discouraged! But God’s grace tracked me down, soothed my soul and then He assured me that He was in control and I didn’t need to push or force anything. My job is to put my faith in Him, rest in His grace, and do the job He has put in front of me. Because at the end of the day – it’s about Him, His kingdom.
Got a question for Bonnie? Leave it in the comments section below, and you’ll automatically be entered to win!
If you are interested in Talking to the Dead, would you consider purchasing it from Proverbs 31 Ministries? All proceeds from book sales go to support this powerful women’s ministry.
About Ariel Lawhon
Ariel Lawhon is the co-founder of She Reads, novelist, blogger, and life-long reader. She lives in Texas with her husband and four young sons (aka The Wild Rumpus). Ariel believes that Story is the shortest distance to the human heart.
Sounds like a very interesting book! I appreciate the reminder that listening is so often more powerful than speaking. That’s why God gave us two ears and only one mouth, right?
Sounds like a great book. I have enjoyed everything recommended on this blog so far, so I look forward to reading this.
I happened here by way of your P31 devotional. Thanks for the wonderful reminder that sometimes being quiet and listening to others and letting myself listen to God are as proactive as trying to solve the problem and fill in the void. Looking forward to reading more of your insights, both in fiction and hopefully more devotionals. Thanks for sharing a piece of your heart openly and willingly!
Loved the “listening” devo and blog. Very powerful. I have never been a fiction reader as I love to read and find little time after reading non-fiction and my Bible. However, after reading Bonnie Grove’s blog and being intrigued by her new book, I could be convinced that non-fiction might impress upon me a whole new world of opportunities, possibilities and side of God’s love I’ve failed to venture…
Listening is really hard for us to do with others and GOD. This past week-end my Son and His Girlfriend was upset because they both was saying that the other just doesn’t listen to what I am saying. Then I read this blog and about the new book. WOW, how God brings thing together. I realy didn’t know what to tell my son but to try harder to listen to her with a clear mind. Just like we should with GOD, not letting other thing take up our minds and letting GOD in.
Bonnie, the title to your book Talking to the Dead, how did you come up with the title?
Bonnie
I’m looking forward to reading your book! It is difficult to find a good listener, and thanks for reminding us that we need to listen. Sometimes we get caught up in doing rather than being.
Alice
Bonnie, I loved, loved, loved your devotion! Especially “keeping his tears company”. Beautiful. So glad I clicked over to read about you and Talking to the Dead. Can’t wait to read it!
Joy! Laura
I recently read that the same letters which spell silent also spell listen. I am trying to listen and be more silent – that’s so hard! Thanks for your words.
Greetings!
Being an aspiring author myself, I found it very interesting to read your blog. I was nodding my head throughout the whole interview about what it’s like being an author! And your new books sounds VERY intriguing. It seems we have a bit in common because part of my degree is in psychology! Thank you and bless you for using your God-given talents to glorify HIM!
Sincerely,
Tricia Postma
“…what it means for humanity to encounter God.” So well put. Thanks for this insightful interview with a unique and talented writer.
Judy: Hurray! So glad to hear you are “hooked”. Music to a writer’s ears! Good luck in the drawing!
Jennifer: It’s good to know God gives us strength to give to others what we desire to have in our own lives. I pray peace for you today.
Was especially touched by the P31 devotion today. Being still before God has been a topic on my mind and in my heart recently. Why is often so hard for us women to be still/quiet before God? Sometimes I wonder if we’re just afraid of what He will say in the silence. I like the idea of BEING the stillness. WOW! What a great impact we could have on others if we would just listen…to them and God.
Would love to read your book! Sounds great!
Lisa: Thanks for coming by! You are so right about two ears, one mouth! Fun way to say it.
Jessica: Thanks for coming by! She Reads is a wonderful site. I’m so honored to be a small part of it.
Angela: Thank you for your warm, encouraging words! They are so appreciated!
Donna: I hope you do take a walk on the fiction side. I love non-fiction too – there are so many interesting non-fiction books out there. I hope you’ll come to enjoy fiction as much!
Jackie: I love how God brings things together like you describe. Praise God!
I came up with the title as I was writing the book. It just fit. I knew it was unusual for Christian Fiction, but it sums things up so well – and really ties into the end of the book. Happily, when it came time to title the book, my wonderful publisher David C. Cook agreed. But not before they did some checking around and testing the title with retailers etc. We chose it, not because it is evocative, but because it tells a story and ties in so well with the events in the book. Thanks so much for coming by today!
Alice: So true – doing feels so good, we get a feeling of accomplishment. The rewards of just “being” are more long term, we have to wait to see them unfold. Thanks for stopping in and sharing your wisdom with us!
Laura: Thank you so much! I love your enthusiasm! Thanks also for your warm words and encouragement.
Vickie: That’s neat! I’ve never noticed that about listen and silent. Cool! Thanks for sharing.
Tricia: Wonderful to hear from you – thanks for your warm words. I hope I encouraged you in some small way. Keep writing!
Kathleen: Mwah! You rock, girl.
I have been praying for two young women whose husbands where killed in separate but tragic accidents this last year – so maybe reading this book would be a good way for me to learn more about what they are going through – I am sure it might prompt me to pray for them in new ways since this isn’t a situation I have had to live through myself. Thanks for ministering to other through counseling and writing! And as a mom of adult sons – I would encourage you to keep working on that balance of having time for your kiddos (and husband) in the midst of serving others! Wow-those years go by SOOO fast!
As a counselor myself, it is so easy to just give advice. I forget that folks just need someone to listen. Thanks for this great and holy reminder.
I read this book…I’d say in one sitting, but I actually carried it around the house…to the washer, the dryer, the dishwasher…until I finished. Amazing.
Donna: God bless your friendship and caring for these two women. I hope my book brings some insight to you as you love these ladies where they are. And thanks for the encouragement to keep striving for balance. My family thanks you too!
Kimberly: Thank you for stopping by. Being quiet and listening is such an important skill. Thanks for sharing your experience with us!
Christa: I’m honored. Thank you so much.
Rachel: I think I missed commenting on your comment – I loved what you had to say. Thanks for being so honest – it isn’t easy to be silent. So often we want to rush in to fix things. I’m not sure about other people, but I’ve noticed when I rush in to try to make someone feel better, it’s usually because I want to feel better (and making them cheer up will make me happier). Sitting with someone takes courage. Praise God, He gives us the courage we need.
Out of my need to comfort and make the pain go away, I always feel like I need just the right words to say when someone talks to me. And when I don’t find the words, I feel inadequate. Thanks, Bonnie, for reminding me that the Lord can move even in the midst of our silence. Truly, nothing is impossible for Him. Thanks for the devo!
Blessings to you!
I have just found She Reads through Proverbs 31! I have been looking for a new book for days now and couldn’t settle on anything i’d found, and now I’ve found it! Thanks so much!
it sounds like a great book from a great author! i look forward to reading it
Hi Bonnie~
I read your book this summer! I could not put it down! It was incredible!
Loved your devotion today. I had a friend from my Sunday school class call today. She needed to come by and share. She is praying through some extremely difficult situations these days.
I wanted to give her something … some kind of formula … if there is one, I don’t have it. I mostly listened and gave her a hug before she left. Your devotion was a timely word. Thank you!
Many blessings,
Cheri
Nineteen years ago, I buried a baby boy too. And I also found solace in the book of Job. The friends who *just* listened were so important to my healing. I have forgotten that sometimes and tried to “find the right words”. Thanks for the reminder.
Sounds like an interesting book that I need to order. Thanks for giving this site to hear more about new writers and their books.
Cant wait to read your work… The topic of grief and loss is of great interest to me. I also went into a degree in Psychology to try to understand my painful past and present. Like you Bonnie I also started writng as a child and the stories were mostly describing the dying process and loss of loved ones… Not something at that age I had experienced. The urge to write has again resurfaced and I feel the Lord leading me to sit a while and let Him tell me what He wants me to write….Silence doesn’t come easy though does it?
Thanks for the inspiration! Jo Howitt-Smith.
Pyschology and Counseling from a Christian/Biblican perspective has always been close to my heart and I cannot wait to read this book.
How do you start writing a book? Do you just begin with a concept and flow from there?
I would love to read your new book
opps! And I can’t wait to incorporate “listening” more into my bible time. Thank you for this post!
Your devotional speaks volumes to many of us who don’t give that time of listening. When someone is pouring their heart out, we are generally thinking of a response in our head and not actively listening to what they are saying. Many times, our responses are not the truth or spiritually correct. We find it easier to agree with the person and respond in a way that would make them feel good. If you don’t have a true response or advice, silence is the best policy. It gives the person and you a chance to actually listen for God’s response and direction.
He can’t speak or be heard, if we are talking over Him! Thanks for the reminder, listen actively before speaking.
God’s timing never ceases to amaze me! Nine years after the birth of my youngest, six years of longing for another baby and one year of contentment with my husband’s decision not to have any more babies I had a positive pregnancy test. Five days later I miscarried. Yesterday, after my blood test at the hospital while I sat in Starbucks waiting for one o’clock and the doctor to confirm the miscarriage God reminded me, “My grace is sufficient for you.” How incredible that today I found your devotion. I’d forgotten about listening. I had to be still to hear from Him.
I look forward to reading your book.
Dale: I totally understand – and there are times when just the right words can help! But more often, when pain is at its worst – listening and “being” with the person is the greatest help we can offer outside of prayer. Thanks for the great comment.
Teri: Yay! So glad to hear SheReads has helped you make a choice. Even gladder (is that a word??) that it is mine! I hope you enjoy! Love to hear from you!
Melissa: I hope you enjoy! Good luck in the drawing!
Cheri: Thank you so much. Really warms my heart to hear you enjoyed Talking to the Dead. I know, we would all love it if there were a formula to follow. So often it seems there should be! Glad to hear you were able to be a loving friend in the situation.
Kim: Thank you for sharing your heart, my friend. And so glad to hear you had people around you who let you “be” and just listened and sat with you. That is a wonderful thing. Blessings to you.
Fonda: Thanks for coming by! I hope you enjoy the book!
Jo: I agree, silence isn’t easy. The brain fusses and flits and refuses to be still. I think you are wise to sit with God and hear from Him what He will have you write. Can’t go wrong that way! Many blessings on your writing.
Tonya: Thanks so much! I hope you enjoy the book. Thanks for stopping by today.
Tracey: Great question. A wonderful writer and friend, Adrien Plass talks about starting a new book – he has written over 30. He sits down to start a new book and thinks, “How do you write a book? I haven’t a clue!” He takes down the last book he wrote and looks at it and thinks, “How did I write this one? I haven’t a clue! I don’t know how to write a book.” I completely relate to his thoughts! But I’ll do my best to answer with some dignity. ☺
It does start with a concept – sometimes it is an image, or a question. Other times it is a character who shows up and captures my attention. Sometimes it is a theme (I write in what I call layers of theme, so theme is important to me). From there, it’s brain power time – I ask myself questions about the idea. “What if” questions and I try to grow the idea. If it’s grows large enough, I will start writing the idea down. If it turns robust I will start outlining the plot and character arches.
I have lots of ideas, but most aren’t novel worthy ideas. Novels are complex things – it takes a rich, robust idea to grow into a novel.
Cindy: Good luck in the drawing, and with your listening time!
Latoya: Thank you for that great reminder! Well said!!
Deanna: Thank you for sharing your story with us today. Prayers for you for healing in every aspect. Lord heap your Grace on Deanna’s head. Let her fully understand sufficiency of grace.
Peace, my friend.
Your words in Monday’s P31 Ministries devotional particularly spoke to me today. I got word yesterday that two dear friends had lost loved ones…one lost her father and one her husband. I have been under conviction to listen more and talk less and you really spoke to my heart. Thank you.
Sounds like a good book. I have enjoyed all the book recommendations so far. Excited to read this one!
Just read the first chapter of “Talking to the Dead”. Can’t wait to read the rest of your book.
Lynn: Prayers for your friends as they go through difficult times of loss. And for you as you offer your love through listening. Peace, my friend.
Lindsey: Love that you are enjoying the choices at She Reads! They are a wonderful ministry! Good luck in the drawing!
Paula: Thanks so much! Good luck to you!
Sounds like a GREAT book!
Thanks Bonnie for your beautiful words. I can relate to being on a “quest to understand my brokeness.” I was told to terminate a prenancy at 21 weeks due to the fact our daughter had a severe birth defect. The doctors painted a very horrible picture of her life if we chose to bring her into this world. We chose God and watever His plan may be. His plan turned out to be blessing our lives with the beautiful miracle of her life. Claire brings a special light into this world and touches the hearts of all who meet her. But, she is fragile in this life and I am sometimes very broken by the road we travel. I find myself interested in the lives of those who have lost children. We’ve been told Claire’s life will not be a long one. She is doing amazing right now at 2 1/2 years old.
You can visit us at : https://www.carepages.com/carepages/babyclairespage)
I just felt your words connect to my heart, thank you!
The book looks fantastic!! Can’t wait to read it. I am the director of my church’s library so you can bet we’ll get a copy for our patrons. Thanks! Pam
Tina: Thanks for dropping by! I hope you enjoy the book, and good luck in the draw!
Tina Martin: This is one of those times I would like to just be silent beside you, watch your daughter play for awhile and soak in the joy and love she brings. Jesus asks us to choose life – He doesn’t tell us it is the painless choice. Just that it is – always – the right one. Thank you for sharing Claire’s beauty with us today.
Pam: I hope you love the book enough to bring it into your church library! Very exciting for me to hear that! Bless you!
Hi Bonnie…I must be honest, the book made me squirm a little, and for that I am grateful! I have never been close to a situation like this and the heaviness of grief and the path it sometimes requires to walk through it, even though it may be like the walking dead, gave me a whole new perspective, appreciation, understanding even, for the process. I also gained insight about the value of the support system I could be. The novel is so real…it is hard to believe it is non-fiction…that’s why you are good at what you do! Looking forward to more!
I can’t wait to read this book! I am so excited that you all have started She Reads, I love to read especially Christian fiction and it will be wonderful to find out about great books. Thank you and many blessings!
Elizabeth: Yep, fiction can make us squirm sometimes. Thanks so much for your kind words and encouragement! And you make a good point about support systems – they are so important to us, even when we are not in crisis.
Judy: Wonderful! Isn’t She Reads fantastic? What a great idea – God inspired, I’m sure. Great to meet a Christian fiction fan!
Thank you for your words. I have been struggling with many things lately, including a relapse into depression, as I deal with past issues of abuse and negative self image, chains that I have somehow put back on, or allowed Satan to drape back over my shoulders. I, too, am learning about brokeness as I revist and deal with the own broken areas in my life. It has been hard but so rewarding. God is good! I have a good friend who has simply listened to my words, spoken and written and I appreciate her willingness so much. She has sat with me in the silence and cried with me. What a blessing to have a friend like this. I love to write and find that I can express myself best that way. There is such freedom and healing in it. So thank you once again. I look forward to reading your book!
Diana: Prayers for you as you work through the things of the past in order to put them in the past. It’s wonderful that you have a friend who listens and loves. That is a true joy! A true friend! I do hope you are also talking with your healthcare provider about how you are feeling and avenues to explore to help you work through this time. I so appreciate your transparency and your heart. Thank you for sharing with me (and us) today. Peace.
Bonnie,
I have been interested in your book since I first saw it advertised in the CBD ad. I have it on my list to purchase for the church library! Thank you for all of your hard work. In a fiction market that seems to be cookie cutter, this book certainly stands out as interesting and different!
Yea, what a fun blog and exciting new book. This looks absolutely fun, I can hardly wait to get started. This book looks enticingly different!